Same is true for a tired baby. Tired babies yawn, rub their eyes, stumble when walking and get cranky. Most parents I know respond as quickly as they can to a tired baby and let the baby sleep in a crib, carseat or sling. We don't force the child to stay awake or to play more or to push through their experience. As soon as the baby signals they are tired, they usually get put to bed. Then, when baby wakes up from their nap, they're ready to go!

Take time to rest when they are tired. What a novel concept!

And adults don't do this ... why?

Most grown ups I know are really, really tired. Entrepreneurs. Working Professionals. Caring for Children. Caring for Parents. Real Sandwich Generation Issues. Community Volunteers. Graduate Students. Home Owners. Pet Lovers. They are burning the candle at both ends and their idea of "rest" is zoning out to TV late at night or sitting on the bleachers watching their kid in a sporting event.

What are the benefits that come from pushing through the pain and ignoring the body's request for rest and renewal? Hmmm... let's see... inefficiency, lack of focus, disorganization... and oh yeah, poor health. Yay! Sign me up! <Not!>

You know the phrase Work Hard, Play Hard? I think we should amend it to Work Well, Play Well, Rest Well! Seriously! If we spent 1/3 of our lives working, 1/3 playing and 1/3 resting, the world would be a much happier place! It's one of the primary reasons that I lead retreats.

To teach people how to slow down. How to say no to external demands and how to say yes to their inner voice that is asking, begging, pleading for nurturing, love, acceptance and R-E-S-T.

Do you do this? If not, why not?

Tomorrow, I'll be teaming up with Geralyn Russell and Gay Webster-Sachs for a one day women's retreat, Adventures in Self Discovery.  If you can't join us but are still interested in learning how to take better care of yourself, perhaps take a peek at my new blog post over at Capital Regional Medical Center's Daily Waddle. It's a post that offers some self care questions for moms and moms-to-be but of course anyone can benefit from some self-care, self-love and self-acceptance, can't they?

Listen to the babies. They are oh so wise. They are in synch with their bodies and with the rhythm of life. We have much to learn from them. (Thank you, sweet Riley... I think I'll go take a nap now!)

Wishing you a weekend filled with rest, rest and more rest.

You might think "of course her theme is PLAY. She has a one year old" but at first, this rather serious Capricorn was not very happy. PLAY? Who has time to PLAY? I have things to do - a baby to raise, clients to care for, a home to keep, family to watch out for. There aren't enough hours in the day. How can I possibly add PLAY to my "to do" list?

Um. Yeah. Exactly. That would be why PLAY was gifted to me as my theme for the year. :-)

Play isn't so much a "do-ing" as it is a state of "Be-ing". It's about fun and laughter and lightness and learning. When we play we are very present and in the moment. Be here now. Yeah, that. Good advice. (note the photo of Riley with toilet paper. pure bliss. in the moment.)

We're only a few weeks into 2012 but I can already tell that keeping PLAY in mind as my theme for the year is helping me be more present in many areas of my life. See what might apply to yours...

1. Time with children. It's easy to get distracted as a WAHM (work at home mom!) and get caught up doing work when it's my time with Riley. Keeping PLAY in the forefront of my mind reminds me to fully engage with her when we are together. Then when she's napping, I'm very focused at getting my work done. Do you work hard and play hard? Or are you all work and no play?

2. Cooking. Those who know me well know that I say I'm a terrible cook. But that's really not true. I'm OK. I'm average. But now that I'm infusing my kitchen time with PLAY (new recipes, letting Riley bang on pots and pans while I create) we're eating meals with more variety and having fun with our food! When was the last time you got creative in the kitchen?

3. My work. I've been an entrepreneur for 11 years now and one of my mottos has been "easy, fun and profitable". This year, I'm focusing extra attention on the FUN. I'm only working with clients I adore and doing work that feels 100% fulfilling. How can you make your projects more playful?

** side bar: Check out this website http://seriouslythemovie.com that a friend sent to me recently! A documentary about how vital play is to our health and happiness! Looks pretty fun! **

4. Time in nature. Now that Riley is walking, we are having a blast exploring the Earth. Grass and dirt and leaves and bushes and flowers and weeds! We spend time almost every day outside and we've been sitting on the ground. When was the last time you sat on Mother Earth and felt her support and embrace?

I invite you, dear Reader, to ask yourself how you can incorporate more PLAY into your life this year? Please feel free to share your ideas below!

And I cried all the way home.

Riley's first birthday was emotional for many reasons.

1. Our baby is no longer a baby. She's a toddler now, walking and talking albeit tentatively on both accounts. The past year has flown by.

2. Memories of last year came rushing back, the whirlwind upheaval of life as we knew it as we tried to comprehend the fact that our daughter (finally) found us and we (FINALLY!) found her! That our meeting was written in the stars.

3. We haven't heard from Riley's birthmom in three months. While technically an open adoption, we don't have a formal agreement about contact. I continue to send monthly updates with photos and stories and we have invited her to be part of Riley's life. Because I am an adult adoptee who was a product of the closed system of adoption, I've desperately wanted it to be different for my daughter. I've hoped she'd grow up knowing her birthmom. And that may still happen. But right now, she is feeling the need to step back and we must respect that. I can't begin to imagine what her world is like.

So I was a river of tears when I picked up that cake because it meant that I have not been dreaming. I have not been living in an alternate universe. I have not been making up stories in my head. Riley's birthday cake was my proverbial "pinch" (pinch me so I know this is real).

You'd think that the endless diapers and bottles and lack of sleep would have made it all real sooner than this.

The Skin Horse said to The Velveteen Rabbit in Margery Williams' classic book : "Real isn't how you are made... It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real."

I'm a Real Mom. Riley's Mom. And her birthday cake proved it. "...Once you are Real you can't become unreal again. It lasts for always" said the Skin Horse.

Lucky me. I get to be Riley's Mommy forever.

I invite you, dear reader, to think of a time in your life when an experience, something or someone helped you become Real?

On January 22, 2011 we got the call that would change our lives forever. At 4:30 a.m. we learned of a healthy baby girl who had been born just an hour previously and her mother wanted to place her in an open adoption. Were we interested? The next 36 hours were a whirlwind of emotion and activity. I remember arriving at the hospital at 4:30 on Sunday afternoon and being checked into a room with Eric and this teeny, tiny baby with dark hair who was sleeping soundly in her incubator. It is a treasured memory that is burned in my brain because it is my first of us as a "threesome". In that instant, we went from being a couple to being a family.

We knew we wanted to be parents. We were on the path to adopt a baby. We thought we were ready for change. But when it arrives so shockingly and so suddenly - we call it the "36 hour pregnancy"- it takes time for the mind, body and spirit to assimilate all that happened. There is a massive deconstruction that occurs on every level so that there is room and space to rebuild something new and different. There is a reason that most people have nine months of pregnancy. It's called time to get over the shock and awe of this new information and integrate the new reality into your being that a new little person is going to change your world forever!

So we got to do our "nine months" of integration and preparing for the new reality after the fact... and while raising said baby! :-) Now that Riley is about to turn a year old, it's a great time to reflect and see how we've managed the change and grown as a result.

1. I am more confident as a person now that I am a parent. We were born to do this. We are good parents. I guess this surprised me because I figured that it was something we had to learn how to do and read about and study up on. (And yes, we did some of that. There are way too many unread baby books around our house that I thought we needed in the early days.) But generally speaking, we are laid back, we are very present with our daughter, and we cherish our time as a family - as a threesome and with our extended family of loved ones who are part of our tribe helping to raise our baby.

2. I am not afraid to ask for help. I've also learned to gracefully receive it. Both Eric and I are very independent people and like to take care of things ourselves. But very quickly we learned that raising a child really does take a village. The night we checked into the hospital, we had friends shopping at Babies 'R Us buying diapers, formula, bottles, a crib and so much more so that when we got home, our home was prepared for our precious bundle. My best friend took a week off of work to stay home with us and help us adjust to our new reality. Our family members scrambled to get flights and come in to help us during the first month. Our church community fed us for an entire month.

3. I live in a state of gratitude every single day. I was a pretty happy person before Riley entered our lives but the loooong fertility journey had taken its toll on me, on Eric and on our marriage. We were worn out, grief stricken and tapped out emotionally, spiritually, physically and financially. Riley's arrival was like a breath of fresh air. We had hope again. We were excited about life. We finally felt like we were "on track" with our lives. (of course it took a few months to come out of the sleep deprived fog to realize all of this!) I count my blessings every single day because I now see how precious life really is and how it can change on a dime. In an instant, your life can be completely transformed.

Riley has taught us a lot in the past year. I believe in the old saying "when the student is ready, the teacher will appear" and I am clear that Eric and I are the students and Riley is our teacher.

For a while now, I've been getting a Universal nudge to include Riley in my work. I didn't know how until a few days ago when I was journaling, I realized that I needed to write about all that I've learned from this amazing being of light who is turning one in two more days. It seems fitting for me to be launching a "change" in my writing habits today as we enter her birthday weekend. The short term commitment is to write 12 weeks worth of "Riley Friday" blogs and see what shows up. See what resonates. For me as the writer. And equally importantly, for you as the reader.

My goal is not to have these Friday blogs become all about parenting but instead to look at the lessons I've learned as a new parent and see how it applies to being an entrepreneur, to living in the world, to making that shift from tired to inspired! I dare say that increasing confidence, asking for help and living in a state of gratitude are all things we strive for.

So I invite you, dear reader, to ask yourself "What change (big or small) is happening in my life right now - or do I want to invite into my life - and how do I wish to grow as a result?"

For me personally, 2011 goes down on record as perhaps the best year of my life! It's the year that our daughter, Riley,  was born and the year that Eric and I shifted from being a couple to being a family. It's been a life long dream of mine to have a child and we've been living our dream for the last eleven months and it's been amazing!

So as we wrap up 2011 in our household, there is untold gratitude for "The Year of Riley". I know in my heart that 2012 will also be filled with miracles. I wonder what they will be...

Here are some questions for you to contemplate as we transition from 2011 to 2012. Many, many blessings to you as we enter the New Year!

2011- Year in Review

1. What was fabulous this year? What were the highlights? Things I am truly grateful for?
2. What accomplishments am I most proud of this year?
3. Who did I most enjoy spending time with this year? Why?
4. What do I wish was different? Were there some goals I didn’t meet?
5. What did I procrastinate about or avoid doing this year? Where did I waste time?
6. In the next 11 days of 2011, what do I need to feel complete?
7. If I could let go of ____________________________, I’d feel so much better!

2012 – Looking Ahead!

1. Who do I want to BE in 2012? And what do I want to DO in 2012?
2. To BE who I want to be and to DO what I want to do, what do I need to change?
3. If I could see big success in 3 areas of my business, what would I choose?
4. If I could see big success in 3 areas of my life, what would I choose?
5. Who do I want to spend more time with in 2012? Why?
6. If I felt 100% confident in my business & life this year, I would fearlessly do _____________________________________________________________.
7. What do I want my theme to be for 2012?

I have a love-hate relationship with it.

When I do it, I feel good. If it's personal writing,I feel happy, understood and free to be me. If it's professional writing, I feel accomplished, like I'm being of service and like I"m paying it forward. If someone reads something I wrote and it helps them in some small way, that's so cool!

When I don't write (on a consistent basis, that is), I'm thinking "I should be writing."

But I'm not a big fan of "shoulds". In fact, I hate the word. The only "shoulds" in my life are feeding and caring for the baby and our pets. Everything else is optional. I mean everything (showering, flossing, cleaning house, you name it!)

Yesterday, I was journaling (for the first time in weeks) and the messae that came through to me was "Write for 21 days and see how it changes your life."

I think the last time I wrote for 21 days straight was in 2002 when I worked through Julia Cameron's Artist's Way and she suggests morning pages. I hate morning pages! All I want to do in the morning is grab a shower and some breakfast and maybe do some yoga stretches to wake up. But write first thing? No way.

But I wrote morning pages. Just never in the a.m. I always wrote in the afternoon or evening. I felt defiant but that way it was less of a "should" for me and was more on my terms.

In the past 11 years of being a business owner, I've written a lot. Four websites, a few dozen articles, a few hundred blog posts, a few thousand Facebook posts and Twitter tweets, speeches, e-mails, marketing campaigns, ad copy and I've also filled up a few personal journals.

But I still haven't claimed "being a writer."

I even attended Jennifer Louden's Writer's Retreat (highly recommended, by the way!) in Taos, NM in 2005 and wrote the outline to my adoption reunion book (it will get written before I die!) but I still have a hard time saying I'm a writer.

So what is a writer? One could argue it's one who writes. And I certainly do plenty of that.

But I think my gremlin associates being a writer with being an "author" of a published book. And I haven't done that. Yet.

But I know that's stinkin' thinkin' ! I don't think any less of my friends who are runners because they've never completed a marathon.

So I'm claiming it here. I'm a writer!

At least for the next 21 days...

(I'll let you know how it goes! And if you want to join me and commit to writing for the next 21 days, send me a note and we'll check in every few days and see how it's going!)

P.S. Oh yeah! the inspiration for this article came from Dawn Goldberg's great free e-book Writing From Your Soul. I encourage you to check it out.

So our conversation went like this…

Whit: “Hey, Lee, guess what? I’ve got some pretty awesome news to share!”

Me: “Yeah, what is it?

Whit: “I just got voted Best Acupuncturist in WNC by Mountain Xpress in their annual awards!”

Me: “COOL! That is so awesome ---- congratulations! Woo hoo!!!! (slight pause while my brain shifts from just friend mode into coaching brain) What an awesome marketing opportunity! You’ve got to put up a sign in your reception area and post it on your website and send it out in your e-mail and post it on Facebook and Linked In and Twitter and send out a press release and and and …” (you can imagine my excitement!)

Whit: (silence) “Uh… I don’t think I can do that.”

Me: “WHAT?!”

Whitney, like many of the people that I coach and have as friends, is incredibly humble. She is highly gifted, has tremendous skill and has a decade long track record to prove it. But she hates to market herself. She doesn’t like to toot her own horn. She’s uncomfortable doing so. She’s happy just knowing she got this kind of award but doesn’t feel the need to share it.

Let me tell you 5 reasons why she MUST share this information with the world.

The #1 reason is because … her clients need it! Her clients want to know that they are going to “The Best Acupuncturist” in their area! It will make them happy, make them proud of her (because of course they all adore her!) and increase their confidence that they are getting top quality health care.

The #2 reason is because… there are people who are sick out there who need her help! They might be looking for an acupuncturist but don’t know who to turn to. But then they read about “The Best Acupuncturist” and they think “gosh, maybe I’ll finally pick up the phone and make an appointment!”

The #3 reason is because… her team needs it! Whitney heads up an incredible group of holistic healing practitioners in a business called Source for Wellbeing. She has a team of excellent professionals offering healing services from massage therapy to chiropractic to naturopathic healing. She has a few administrative folks that she treasures who help her keep the machine well-oiled. Those folks need to know it because they want to feel good about where they are working! They want to know they are affiliated with “The Best Acupuncturist” and work at "The Best Holistic Health Center". And they need to spread the word to their clients in case one of them is seeking additional healing support.

The #4 reason is because… her daughter needs it! Hailey is like a niece to me – I love her to pieces - and she is eleven years old. She just started middle school and is at that stage in life where she is trying to figure out who she is in the world and what matters in life. Whitney has been a single mom for the past six years since Hailey’s Dad died and Hailey needs to know that women can be super successful in the professional world. Hailey may see that at home but when there’s some external validation, it may help her see her mom in a new light.

The #5 reason is because… her business needs it! Getting awards and recognition is part of building your reputation and your track record as a successful business owner. Every time you are interviewed in a magazine, newspaper or on TV, you need to share it with your clients. When you read someone’s bio and see they were interviewed on Oprah or CNN or The Today Show, don’t you think “wow, she must be really good!”

Whether the recognition is local, regional or national, it’s fair game to share the news with the world. You don’t have to be obnoxious about it. State the facts in a newsletter going out to your client base. Post the award in your front office where people can see it. Write a short note on Facebook and Linked In… “I am delighted and honored to receive this award. Thanks to my clients and supporters for having confidence and faith in me!”

I'm happy to report, now that the news has sunk in, Whitney and her team at Source for Well Being are joyfully sharing the news with their clients. And the world - at least Western North Carolina! - will be better for it! Huge Congratulations to you, my dear friend Whitney, and all of your amazing folks at Source!!!

Our daughter, Riley, just turned 7 months old. Her arrival was such a surprise (she's adopted!) that we didn't have time to plan. We got a call on a Saturday morning, checked in to the hospital with her on Sunday night and by Monday, she was home with us!

I continued meeting with clients for the first few months of her life (often with her in tow!) and finally took some maternity leave time this summer to focus solely on her, our home and our family.

This summer, I've had time to reflect on the last few months and  I have realized that there are many priniciples I teach and live by as an entrepeneur that have helped Eric and I to be relatively successful (at least I think so!) as parents so far.

1. Build your tribe.

2. Ask for help.

3. Put systems in place.

4. Trust your intuition.

5. Stay focused on your vision.

6. Practice Self Care.

7. Learn to say 'no'.

Such simple ideas, yet powerful in practice. In the coming weeks, I'll take time to expand upon each idea so you can see how you can apply in it your own life. For now, I must go get my daughter. She is crying for her morning meal!

As you can see by the photo below (thanks to my friend Karyn Greenstreet for creating the before and after shot!) my desk was embarrassingly messy. I finally decided I was sick and tired of being sick and tired and decided that today was the day to fix it.

But I knew I couldn't do it alone. I needed accountability. Enter Facebook!

If you have a task that you need help accomplishing, you may want to follow my steps below to set yourself up for success...as you can by the photo below, it worked for me! :)

1. Decide on your project. Keep it small and manageable.

2. Take a deep breath and post your personal challenge on your Facebook profile. Give it a timeline (an hour, a day, a week) and then report in periodically with your Facebook peeps. Ask them for help and encouragement and suggestions to complete your task. I was so inspired by people's recommendations including strategies, books and links to get organized... check them out on my FB profile here.

3. When you get distracted and want to abandon your project in favor of something else, go back and look at your comittment - out there for all the world to see! - and recommit to achieving your goal. Focus on how you'll feel once you complete the project!

4. Celebrate! Report in to your FB friends and share your success. And treat yourself to a little something too... for me, I rewarded myself with a walk outside with the dog half way through and then convinced my husband to take me out to dinner tonite! tee hee! :)

So what project are YOU going to commit to? Post it on FB and let me know and I"ll cheer you on!

The New Year brings with it a blank slate, a sense of "anything's possible" and lots of hope and anticipation about the future. It feels fresh and new and squeaky clean!

Here are a few questions that I invite you to consider as we embark on the New Year. You may want to pull out your journal and write down your observations, or print this out and discuss over a meal with your partner, children or best friend.

2010 in Review

1. What did you accomplish this year?
2. What challenged you this year?
3. What did you learn about yourself?
4. What are you ready to let go of?
5. What do you wish to bring forward into the new year?

Looking Ahead to 2011

1. What is your theme for the New Year?
2. What specific goals do you have?
3. How would you like to FEEL in 2011?
4. What new experiences would you like to have?
5. What do you want to be celebrating on Dec 31, 2011?

Happy New Year! May 2011 bring abundant blessings to you and yours!

Coach E.

P.S. If you are looking for help or support in inviting abundant blessings into your life, I invite you to join me January 4th to learn more about my new Inspired Entrepreneur Coaching Group in Tally, consider signing up for the 4 week teleclass 28 Days of Solitude in February or join me for Solitude in the Mountains: Space to Be and Breathe in Georgia in March!